{"id":1371,"date":"2014-03-28T05:30:35","date_gmt":"2014-03-28T15:30:35","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/grumpyseniors.com\/?p=1371"},"modified":"2014-03-27T20:46:27","modified_gmt":"2014-03-28T06:46:27","slug":"aiea-speak","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/grumpyseniors.com\/?p=1371","title":{"rendered":"Aiea speak"},"content":{"rendered":"

I have the feeling this is going to upset some people.<\/p>\n

It shouldn’t.<\/p>\n

It’s based on scientific studies on how communities change to be different from those around them.
\nIt Darwinism at it’s best.<\/p>\n

It’s still going to piss some people off.<\/p>\n

It’s taken me almost twenty years but I’ve learned a new language.
\nNot that I use it.<\/p>\n

But I can understand it and read it – if anyone were to write that way – which they don’t.
\nI think.<\/p>\n

The wife and I lived for a long time in Hawaii Kai.<\/p>\n

But as the years slipped by she longed for the motherland – Aiea.<\/p>\n

It’s where she grew up and has her roots, so to speak.
\nA place where she can find lots of tofu.<\/p>\n

\"OLYMPUS<\/a>I couldn’t find a picture of old-time Aiea except for those with the sugar mill.<\/p>\n

So, here’s my motorcycle.<\/p>\n

The lovely lass has put up with me, as wonderful as I am, for a long time.<\/p>\n

The least I could do is pack everything we own and buy a home in central Oahu.<\/p>\n

I still miss Makapuu and driving past Hanauma Bay.<\/p>\n

But she’s happy and that’s important to me.<\/p>\n

We all know – if the wife is unhappy she’ll make damn sure the husband is too.
\nCall it an investment on my part.<\/p>\n

When the winds blows in the right direction she can smell Aiea from where we live and her heart goes all a-flutter and she is content.<\/p>\n

We’ve been here for a about eight years now and she has slowly reverted to Aiea-speak.<\/p>\n

Apparently Aiea has its own language and I’m proud to admit I am now bi-lingual.<\/p>\n

I’m no English teacher so I can’t explain what she does to the English language, except mangle it.<\/p>\n

\"Yeah-1\"<\/a>One of our dogs is named “Toby”.<\/p>\n

He’s the sick one we have to carry a lot.<\/p>\n

When the wife stops checking Facebook for 30 seconds, she starts in…
\n“Toby come”
\n“Toby shee-shee?”
\n“Toby outside?”<\/p>\n

Then there’s the ever famous…
\n“Toby mum-mum?”
\n…for dinner.<\/p>\n

\"yeah-2\"<\/a>Listening to her talk to her girlfriends on the phone usually consists of, “Yeah yeah yeah”.<\/p>\n

If she’s really in agreement it can stretch to, “Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah”.<\/p>\n

Now, this has to be spoken in the right way.
\nEach yeah slides right into the next.<\/p>\n

No pausing or you’re speaking gibberish.<\/p>\n

One\u00a0can only imagine what’s going on at the other end of the phone.<\/p>\n

I’m only touching on this strange language.<\/p>\n

It’s easy to learn Aiea-speak.
\nJust drop adverbs, adjectives, pronouns, a lot of verbs and most other things you learned in school.<\/p>\n

No, it’s not pidgin.
\nIt’s a completely different language.<\/p>\n

Boy, am I going to catch hell when she sees this.<\/p>\n

“Courtney die.”<\/p>\n

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