{"id":1670,"date":"2014-06-13T15:39:45","date_gmt":"2014-06-14T01:39:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/grumpyseniors.com\/?p=1670"},"modified":"2014-06-13T21:17:21","modified_gmt":"2014-06-14T07:17:21","slug":"a-grumpy-restaurant-review","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/grumpyseniors.com\/?p=1670","title":{"rendered":"A grumpy restaurant review"},"content":{"rendered":"

There’s an old saying…
\nDoing the same thing over and over expecting a different outcome is the definition of insanity.<\/p>\n

Not true, of course.
\nOtherwise 80-percent of our friends and every politician would be on heavy-duty meds.<\/p>\n

Case in point is my relationship with Zippys and Big City Diner.<\/p>\n

Zippys<\/a> you know about.<\/p>\n

Its\u00a0gone to hell but I keep giving them just one more chance.
\nAnd one more, and one more.<\/p>\n

To say it keeps disappointing me would be an understatement.<\/p>\n

Maybe I’m insane.
\nOr just a real nice guy.<\/p>\n

I pick #2.<\/p>\n

Getting back to\u00a0Big City Diner – we have to start off with the story of the patty melt.<\/p>\n

\"Red<\/a>Now, a patty melt is a specific type of burger.<\/p>\n

It consists of a hamburger patty and Cheddar or Swiss cheese along with a hint of onions between two slices of grilled rye bread.<\/p>\n

I don’t know who invented it but he or she is a hero in my eyes.<\/p>\n

This is from Red Robin in Vegas.<\/p>\n

Courtesy of the wife who takes a picture of everything she\u00a0eats.
\nAnd if I’m within 50 feet of her, she takes a picture of my stuff too.<\/p>\n

Amazing woman.<\/p>\n

When done well, it’s heaven in your mouth.
\nThe patty melt, not the picture.<\/p>\n

There are two places I’ve found that do it right.<\/p>\n

One is Sam’s Place at the Navy-Marine Golf Course and the other is Red Robin in Las Vegas as noted above.
\nThe Yum Yum Tree used to make great ones but they disappeared eons ago.<\/p>\n

\"Sistas<\/a>The Big City Diner sells what it calls a Sista Patty Melt.<\/p>\n

They can make what they want but shouldn’t call it something that it isn’t.<\/p>\n

It ain’t a patty melt and it ain’t my sista.<\/p>\n

It bears no resemblance to the delightful picture above.<\/p>\n

I have no idea what it is – except bad.<\/p>\n

Bad enough it should be on Zippys’ menu.<\/p>\n

That is an actual picture of the suspect – taken when I had to pause to settle my nerves and find the strength to continue.<\/p>\n

The first time I had their patty melt, I was amazed in a bad way.<\/p>\n

A hamburger patty with jack cheese, way too many mushrooms, onions, a big glob of Thousand Island dressing all squeezed between two pieces of Texas Bread – whatever that is – held together with some toothpicks.<\/p>\n

It had somewhat of a sour taste.
\nMaybe the salad dressing.<\/p>\n

It wasn’t a patty melt.
\nNot even close.<\/p>\n

It was a gut bomb.<\/p>\n

For those who have lived a sheltered life, here is the Urban Dictionary definition:<\/p>\n

A gut bomb is\u00a0usually a super-sized fast food or greasy spoon diner food item that, when ingested, immediately explodes in your gut, decimating your stomach lining.
\nThe item usually has a very short (but painful) residence time in your digestive tract before performing a rapid exit to the outside world, and being released back into the wild.<\/p>\n

Now you too can do restaurant reviews with authority.<\/p>\n

Anyway,\u00a0a month or so later we went back and stupid me ordered it again.
\nI always give people and things a second chance.<\/p>\n

It was as bad as before.
\nIt’s nice to see some consistency in this world.<\/p>\n

Being a person that never learns my lesson, I gave it a shot again last week, this time saying no Thousand Island dressing.<\/p>\n

That was the same night my wife called me “old”.
\nI should have known\u00a0things were not going to turn out well.<\/p>\n

It was only marginally better.<\/p>\n

The problem is there aren’t many positives so getting rid of one negative doesn’t help that much.<\/p>\n

There’s nothing wrong with throwing a bunch of stuff together to see what you get.
\nI do that all the time.<\/p>\n

You should see some of the stuff I’ve built in my garage.<\/p>\n

But I don’t hang it on a poster and invite people to buy it sight unseen.<\/p>\n

Then again there’s no excuse for me to keep ordering it – expecting it to get better.<\/p>\n

This whole thing is making me grumpy.<\/p>\n

Their fried rice is good though.<\/p>\n

Share this:<\/h3>