{"id":564,"date":"2013-10-25T19:58:22","date_gmt":"2013-10-26T05:58:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/grumpyseniors.com\/?p=564"},"modified":"2013-10-25T19:58:38","modified_gmt":"2013-10-26T05:58:38","slug":"cars-and-cows","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/grumpyseniors.com\/?p=564","title":{"rendered":"Cars and cows"},"content":{"rendered":"

I love stuff on the internet.<\/p>\n

I find things no self-respecting newspaper would touch.<\/p>\n

That of course, leaves out the British tabloids, but they are more focused on the Royals.<\/p>\n

Maybe the TV news would, but if there’s no video they’re stuck.<\/p>\n

I learned more than I ever wanted to about cow farts.<\/p>\n

Sorry, flatulence.
\nI realize there may be people with sensitivities reading this stuff.<\/p>\n

But sharing what we learn\u00a0is important to a civilized society – so here it comes…<\/p>\n

The scientific side of my brain was thrilled to learn the average cow poofs out enough methane in one day\u00a0to run a refrigerator for 24 hours.<\/p>\n

How great is that to know?<\/p>\n

You now have a conversation starter at your next cocktail party.<\/p>\n

\"fart-catcher-sized\"<\/a>People will look at you in amazement.
\nOne way or the other.<\/p>\n

There’s a bunch of scientists in Argentina who stuffed tubes up the rear ends of some cows to collect the gas and put in tanks.<\/p>\n

Can you imagine what led up to this wonderful experiment?<\/p>\n

“Hey Carlos, I have a cow outside and some leftover tubing. Let’s see what we can do with it.”<\/p>\n

Anyway, they say they found a way to change cow poofs into fuel.<\/p>\n

This is bordering on the magical.<\/p>\n

This is a well-known scientific process because they used things like valves and pumps to collect this stuff and put it\u00a0in some tanks.<\/p>\n

I remember when we were doing scientific stuff in engineering school before I took a side trip into the wonderful and glamorous world of radio and TV.<\/p>\n

We would pour different kinds of stuff into beakers and watch it foam up or turn color.<\/p>\n

This was before someone discovered what happens when you put Mentos into coke bottles, so it wasn’t much fun.<\/p>\n

Since I got tired of turning pink stuff into blue stuff I decided to change my education to something that used valves and pumps because I could use hammers and screwdrivers.<\/p>\n

Back to their experiment…<\/p>\n

Of course there’s a downside.<\/p>\n

They say, “As an energy source it is not very practical at the moment.”<\/p>\n

Scientists are realistic.<\/p>\n

As an expert in valves and pumps, I can say with scientific certainty it wouldn’t be easy to strap a cow on the back of your car, feed it a bunch of beans, open some valves and chug off to the mall.<\/p>\n

And what about all that other stuff that comes out that end while you’re parked in front of Macys?<\/p>\n

There are a million failed experiments for every success.<\/p>\n

That’s why many old scientists are grumpy.<\/p>\n

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