Texts, or instant messages are affecting the few brain cells I have left.

Stay with me while I explain this and swing you to my side.

I leave Instant Messaging active on my iPhone cause it’s the wife’s preferred method of communication and sometimes people from work get hold of me that way.

If I could turn it off – I would.

When I was a kid we talked over two tin cans with a string.

Great fun.

Then I got older and people called me on the phone.
That was fine if it was short.

I tried to keep calls to 30 seconds or so.
Unless we were discussing beer or what bar had the most single women that weekend.

Those calls could get to two or three minutes.
Exhausting.

Then people started emailing me.
Way too much.

The delete button became my close friend.

Now they text me.
And it drives me crazy.

Every time one comes through I have visions of 16-year-old girls wandering the mall texting their brains out.

What could they possibly be saying?

“Here I am at Macy’s and I’m looking at shoes. Want a picture?”

Some walk around with the phone to their ear listening to their friend’s breath.

That’s another story for a later time.

I don’t have a problem ignoring instant messages, especially when I’m driving.

But the phone keeps trying to remind me I should run into a utility pole and read it NOW.

Maybe it would be okay if it was sexting, but at my age that’ll never happen.

I probably wouldn’t know how to respond anyway.

The wife sometimes texts me in the middle of rush hour to share how bad the traffic is.

I usually respond with a simple “OK” so she knows I got it.
I’m trying to be polite.

I don’t want to encourage a conversation because she might end up in the trunk of the car in front of her, plus I’m usually doing something at the moment.

She’s the apple of my eye, but it doesn’t work.

More than once she’s texted me from the other room.

It’s really okay to walk down to the other end of the house and see me in person.

Really.
Maybe I’ll get a hug then, too.

Want to stand out from the crowd?

If it can’t be said – completely – in one sentence, do a phone call instead.

Reach out and actually touch someone.

What a concept.

Yes, I feel better.