I was cruising through Google one night.

My search was idle curiosity about other websites and how they look at old people.
Being old I have some interest in that area.

If you Google “Grumpy Seniors”, we’re up there as #1.
Thank you very much.

Then it’s followed by lots of pages of websites dealing with why old folks are grumpy.

I didn’t realize it was such a burning issue.

Most seniors I know are quite pleasant.
Including me.

These sites really suck.

Not to say what you’re reading is a prime example of Pulitzer material, but the others are so self-important and serious.

As an old coot I am more than qualified to pass judgment on all this.

They treat old age like a disease and spend way too much time on what makes seniors happy and what to do with a grumpy person.

Rule #1 – a good nap cures about anything.

With that in mind, here’s answers to those questions everyone seems to be searching for:

Seniors are happy when they get involved in something besides sitting on their butt wondering why everything aches.
Just like all other people.

Deal with a grumpy senior the same way you’d deal with anyone else.
If they’re being pissy – ignore them and go find some happy people to hang out with.

Or you can toss them a movie ticket and say “Get off your butt.”

Then leave.
They’d rather be left alone anyway.

Some experts say they need a hug.
Okay – so give them some.

Good ones.
Long ones.

But what they really need is a bag of dark chocolate or a $50 bill.
That’s perk anyone up.

Scientists are beginning to discover dark chocolate is a wonder food.

It lowers blood pressure, cures things like ED and the sniffles.

Dark chocolate is what goes in to Dobash Cake and we’ve already established that’s the finest food on Earth.

Now get out there and make someone happy.

If you want to start with someone easy, bring me chocolate.
The expensive kind.

Or a Dobash cake.