Some things simply suck

dying-flower-sizedEverything comes into being, lives and then dies.

Some live a long time, some a matter of hours.

But we all come and we all go.
Depending on what you believe, there is something else waiting…or not.

Like the old saying, you can’t escape death and taxes.
I guess we should add government spying to that list.

The wife and I are saying goodbye to another member of our family.
Toby was one of five puppies born so long ago.

Almost 15 years, but it seems so much less than that.

The dad, mom and one other have already passed away.
It’s his turn and the others, living elsewhere, are close.

The infirmities of old age have now grown to be more than he can handle.

Saturday we take him to the vet and turn him free to whatever there is afterwards.

I hope there is something.

Yes, he’s just a dog and the world is full of people who are dying when they shouldn’t.
We know the difference.

But he was a member of the family and a year of extensive caregiving creates a bond that can’t be ignored.

I hope it made a difference.

The mind fights a battle with a decision such as this.

I’m not against euthanasia.
I hope I have the option to consider it if my quality of life ever gets that bad.

But for me – it would be my decision.
For an animal, it’s still my decision.

There’s a constant battle between mind and heart over what to do.
Is my assessment of his quality of life accurate?

Does he even have awareness of quality of life?
If he could talk, would he say “I want to live” or “Let me go”?

I can answer those questions for myself when the time comes.
Answering for anything, or anyone else, is tough.

There’s a very thin, almost invisible line between it’s okay and it’s not.

Life can be a bitch sometimes and this stuff has kept me up at night.

On a brighter note, we are off to Vegas next week to either feed the retirement fund…or not.

Probably not.

Hopefully¬†I won’t be grumpy by then.

Update (Saturday): After a long visit with the vet we all decided to hold off for a while. The little guy rallied over the past few days.
I’ve never seen an animal with a stronger will to survive.

2 thoughts on “Some things simply suck

  1. So very sorry, Courts and Lani–I know what the dogs mean to you both. As Buddha taught: All of life is loss–we just have to accept the brief gift given to all of us. May this Thanksgiving bring you some joy

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.