I have a song stuck in my head.
It’s driving me crazy.

To make thing’s worse, I hate that song.
How’d you like this echoing through brain all day?

“Your lipstick stains on the front lobe of my left side brains”

Huh?
What the hell does that mean?

So – this stuff is the secret to a million-seller hit song?

Given my scatological tendencies I have scores of platinum records rolling around in my head just waiting to burst forth on the Top 40.

Come on baby show me glean
I want to watch you strut and preen.
Gimme poom, lemme toon, my nose is a big balloon.
My toes are brown and I’m going to town
Skipping and strutting all around.

Whataya think?
Yeah, Billboard 100 maybe.

Anyway, this thing won’t go away in my brain no matter what threats I make.

It’s like when the party is over and there’s always one person who’s still there and won’t take the hint: GET OUT !

I have studied this and the scientific term is earworm.

How appropriate and how unusual.
Normally they give this stuff some sort of Latin name nobody can pronounce.

This is why doctors go to school for a bazillion years.
Learning the words is tough but then they can talk to each other with no one else knowing what they’re saying.

Today, some docs call it “repetunitis”.

I’m sure they did that just to bring calm to the medical universe.

“My heart is bound to beat right out my untrimmed chest”

Good grief.

Let’s study this for a moment…

Researchers at Dartmouth say when they played part of a familiar song to people, their auditory cortex automatically filled in the rest.

In other words, their brains kept “singing” long after the song had ended.

Sounds like what I got.
It’s also called a brain itch.

Great.

Now I got earworm and brain itch.

Scientists say the only way to scratch it is to repeat the song over and over in your mind.

That’s what’s happening.

Since this has happened to all of us one time or another you know it’s like a mosquito bite.

The more you scratch the more you itch, and now you’re stuck in an unending cycle of…

“Hey soul sister, ain’t that mister mister on the radio, stereo
The way you move ain’t fair you know
Hey soul sister, I don’t wanna miss a single thing you do tonight.
heyyyyy heyyyy heyyyy”

Somebody shoot me.
Please.

I worry about our country.
No, not the NSA peeking in my email or what’s-his-name in the White House.

I worry about Facebook.

I’m not a big fan.
In fact, I have many more important things to do besides social media.

Like nap.
And eat.

For me a computer is a tool, not a life style.
I prefer to call someone or speak to them face-to-face.

I keep it short, though.

I use Facebook to note a new blog entry and then go back to whatever I was doing.
Usually a nap.

But I occasionally look around a bit because almost everybody in the world I know is on it.

It’s a way to learn who’s doing what and find something to worry about.
And what they’re eating.

Yes, I know that’s why most of you think you’re on it.

My wife is always posting pictures of yummy food.

That’s probably as close as I’ll ever get to seeing it on the dining room table.

That’s not to say she doesn’t cook good stuff – just not what’s in the pictures.

I’m not sure why she does that except to torture me.
Mission accomplished.

She’s a busy lady.
She’s on Facebook.

A lot.
I worry about that.

I also learned Miley Cyrus has a half-brother.
I worry at night about the genetic makeup in that family.

I worry about where her tongue has been recently.

I worry this is how Justin Bieber will look in a couple of years.

Yeah, I prejudge too much.
I have to cut that out.

What I really find worrisome is what some people post.

Some guy updated his page while standing at the altar getting married.

Then, of course, there are the pictures of the underage drinking party you were at.

The police like those.
Maybe you should worry.

Bitching about how much you hate your work and the boss is another nice item.
The company that’s about to fire you likes that.

Or the picture you posted messing around with other women.

Your just-about former girl friend sees them 10 minutes later.

Feeling a bit dumb?

Welcome back to the single life.

I worry when the wife announces we’re going out-of-town.

I would think it would be helpful to print a map to our soon-to-be empty house so the burglar knows where to go.

Warning – big time alarm system with video.
Hit another house.

Then my biggest worry are the posts that are so stupid I can’t believe they’re for real.

The sad thing is – they usually are.

I worry this country’s going to hell.

My favorite is the selfie.
Something I have spent some time pondering.

I don’t expect anyone should be what other’s expect them to be, but good grief.

This whole thing makes me grumpy.

Once in a while I stumble across something that you’ll want to know about.

This qualifies.

There are stupid ideas and there are very stupid ideas.
This falls firmly in category number two.

And if this doesn’t make you grumpy, we should have coffee because you’re obviously a very rare individual and I need you in my life.

Airbus is the European company that makes planes in competition with U.S. made Boeing.
You most likely have flown on one.

In fact, if you get on a Hawaiian Airlines flight to the mainland, that’s an Airbus.

The folks in the top corporate towers of Airbus think they have the answer to jamming more people on a plane.

Look at this…

Airbus has filed a patent for a seat that packs people in without those pesky space wasting cushions, folding tables and leg space.

What it has is basically a bicycle seat, and when a seat isn’t being used, it folds vertically to save space.

Just genius.

Can you imagine plumping your butt into that thing for your yearly six-hour pilgrimage to the mainland?

The idea is to cram more people on the plane and make more money.

Capitalism at it’s best.

Since we’re talking about stupid ideas, I offer this to Airbus.

This could be the next big thing.

Airbus says most people would go along with it if it makes the flight cheaper.
The scary thing it’s probably right.

Some of you folks are really cheap.
And weird.

In a further rare bit of honesty, Airbus says packing more people on board is going to result in “reduced” comfort.
Duh.

It goes on to say – the goal is basically to figure out how far they can push things without causing an airborne revolt.
Duh again.

Who came up with this stupid idea?

The French side of the company.
Mais bien sûr.

It figures.

If you’re on the mainland you can drive or ride the train.

We’re not doing that here.
Consider yourself stuck with whatever they give you.

Listen up Hawaiian Air – don’t go there.

You don’t want to see me get any more grumpy than I am.

For the curious, here’s the patent application.
Read it and weep.

Now I’m in a bad mood.