Being a bit dumb in the rain

I have spent more than 30 years working with Civil Defense with the City.
Yes, it’s got a different name now but does the same stuff.

I have hundreds of hours in the middle of floods, hurricanes, storms, whatever.
I’ve directed traffic, evacuated people, fought brush fires and pulled drunks out of car wrecks.

Flooded road 24Jul2016One thing I have never understood is why people try to drive through a flooded road too fast or too deep.

They almost always end up stalled and sitting, looking stupid, with two feet of water in their car.

Is it because they are incapable of understanding what might happen?

Or maybe they’re missing too many brain cells to figure it out.

I guess that’s the same thing.

There’s really only two things to remember.
Maybe writing it down and pasting it on the dashboard might help:

1) Drive through deep water too fast and the water will pile up in front of your car, move into the engine compartment and kill the engine.
If water gets into the engine through the intake manifold while it’s running, it’ll destroy the engine.

2) Try to drive through water too deep and water gets onto the engine compartment, no matter how slow you’re going, and kill the engine.
If it gets into the intake manifold while it’s running it’ll destroy the engine.

It’ll also flood your car’s interior making it a piece of expensive, moldy junk.

Almost without exception, when I came up on one of these scenes, the driver was a young guy or a woman.
Figure out your own reasons – I’m not going there.

Seriously, if the road has a foot of water on it, don’t go there.
If there is about 6 inches of water on it, go real slow.

It’s not hard to remember.

Lecture over.

I feel better, thank you.

Stolen, and worth it

Stolen but I don’t remember when or from where.

death of common senseToday we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend – Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.

No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
– Knowing when to come out of the rain,
– Why the early bird gets the worm,
– Life isn’t always fair,
– Maybe it was my fault.

Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don’t spend more than you earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).

His health began to deteriorate when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year old charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their children.

He declined further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when their child became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to survive as the churches became businesses, and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your house, but he could sue you for assault.

The¬†end was near after a woman didn’t stop to think that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a large settlement.

He passed on a hot night in Dallas when people turned against those who protected them

Common Sense was preceded by death by…
– his parents, Truth and Trust,
– his wife, Discretion,
– his daughter, Responsibility,
– and his son, Reason.

He is survived by five step-brothers…
– I know my rights,
– I want it now,
– Authority sucks,
– Someone else is to blame,
– I’m a victim.

His funeral was not well attended so few know he was gone.
Makes you grumpy, doesn’t it?

Yeah, I’ve been missing

May-December romance - medI got a nice note from someone today asking if I had run off with a 16-year old or something like that.

It’s nice to be missed.

While the idea is intriguing, the answer is much more boring than that.

I went back to school.

At my age.
I must be stupid.

To prove it, here’s a bit of the gibberish I’m supposed to understand:

“Another example is given by Zp star for p prime. If p is prime, then Z*p is cyclic (of order p-1). So remember that Zp star is the multiplicative group, modular p. And if P is prime, then this contains every element from 1 to p-1. So this gives an example of a cyclic group. Now it’s easy to be confused here because p is prime, but the order of the group Zp star is not prime, it’s in fact, p-1 which for p greater than 3 will not be a prime. So this case is not covered by the previous theorem.”

I’m almost done.
With a 3.33 (B+) grade point average.

This proves the theory that guessing is a viable form of taking a test.

Not bad for not having any idea what the hell the professor talked about.

But he’s a grumpy guy so I like him.

I’ll be back.